Things have changed,

yet I’m still here wondering what to do,

still here waiting for you

Sitting in the corner of the room, 

her head buried in her knees,

her fingers sunk in her hair,

tears streaming down her face,

with a heart full of ache,

she kept telling herself she’s okay, she’s fine,

but she’s not,

she’s messed up,

so messed up,

I’m fine,

but she’s not,

and she does not know how to be okay anymore. 

What is it about that certain someone that we love so much even though they do not love us?

They do not know us nor recognize us?

They don’t know your own name,

never have seen your face,

but still,

you love them,

so hard,

that it hurts as you watch that person from afar?

When will ever get the chance to talk?

to start a move so we can be at least friends?

then maybe hope for more to happen later on,

when?

She hadn’t dreamed about him for a long time,

how she craves for it,

to feel him for one night even if it’s not real.

She finally did that night,

It started out bizzare,

and went on to a part where she wished to never end,

Sweet and loving,

he looked at her with such intensity,

his dark brown eyes never left hers,

his thumb caressing her cheek,

his other hand tangled in her dark hair,

their foreheads touching,

his sweet scent drugging her.

She had never dreamt of him like this,

it was the first dream she had of him touching her lovingly,

and how she loved it and wished for it to be real.

When his lips met hers,

she was lost,

melting in his arms as he took her breath away,

and she kissed him back like there was no tomorrow,

as if they were the only people in the world,

but alas, 

A dream is just a dream,

and dreams could turn into a nightmare,

he denied her,

pushed her away,

telling her that it was all a game,

not looking at her in the eyes.

How her heart shattered hearing his words,

Then she awakes.

How it all felt so real,

how she coulf still feel his lips on hers,

his touch,

how her heart still hurts from his rejection,

it was painful and she was deeply hurt,

but she was happy,

to at least dream of him touching her and looking at her with so much love,

Something she had never received from him,

It was bittersweet,

a stab in the heart yet a bliss.

She was just a small town girl,

Who did everything she could to make people happy,

unitl she forgot about her own.

Everytime she tried to make people happy,

she received pain in return.

No one asked her what’s wrong,

no one noticed how broken she was.

She was left alone,

broken beyond pieces.

She got tired of everything,

tired of letting it go everytime she got hurt,

wanting to end everything,

but she didn’t.

She was alive and she believed that one day,

she will be happy again,

she still kept on believing,

holding on to the small light of hope in her hands.

All she did now was wait,

and still waiting,

for the day to come,

for her to be happy once more.

The thoughts of you still linger in my head,

My hand never felt so empty,

My body never felt so cold,

My soul never felt so lonely.

Is the thought of you loving me is wrong?

Even the slightest of it?

I have been wishing for it,

For you to call me love, 

To hold me when I sleep,

To wake up every morning to that sweet smile,

to love you for eternity.

I have come to the conclusion that you are not mine,

Neither will you ever be,

We are not meant to be together, 

but my wishful heart hopes that you’ll be in it,

that you’ll love me,

that we are meant to be,

If only we could be.

To you I do not exist,

my face, my name,

you knew not of it,

but it is not possible for someone to fall in love,

with a person you’ve never met before,

and that is what happened to me when I saw you,

love at first sight,

and I could never throw it away,

I could never shake you off,

as you have my heart dearly,

and I wish for you to keep it.

How long has is it been,

unable to feel such a magnificent feeling,

happiness,

longing to feel it once more.

through mountains and trees I have crossed,

through roads and pavements I have walked,

through every person that I went by,

I have searched,

yet I have not found,

happiness.

She just wants to be loved,

to be cared for,

to be adored.

She wants that person to look at her like she was the best thing that ever happened,

she wants someone to hold her through the dark and tough days,

she wants someone to say those magical three words to her,

she wants someone to be there for her,

she wants someone to love her for her,

someone that doesn’t judge her,

she wants someone to take care of her fragile heart,

and take it gladly.

It is not the act of selfishness,

it’s just the feeling of wanting to be needed,

wanting to be love,

by someone who does it gladly,

not because they had to but because they wanted to,

she just wants to be loved.

She was lost,

enveloped in darkness,

no light, no life,

she was all alone.

People who she though had cared for her disappeared,

vanished into thin air,

when she needed them the most.

Cold and empty,

she waited for someone,

someone to reach out and save her,

from the deathly roads and horrors,

but none came for her,

she was left all alone.